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I Can’t Come In Today…

It’s Stay At Home Because You’re Well Day, which might mean calling into work with some creative excuses. Here are a few for us Orlandoans specifically (sorry, boss!)

I think we’ve all taken a few liberties while calling in sick. Among my many and varied excuses of sick days past are a few genuine jewels of dramatic and literary significance— from “I stepped on glass” to “I am stuck on a broken down train,” my excuses usually involve a problem that is far more urgent than whatever I’m trying to get out of. Let’s dream for a moment, though, shall we? What if we could stay home from work and school for fun reasons instead of inconvenient ones? I am going to take a few moments out of my work day to run with this fantasy, and pay homage to the City Beautiful at the same time.

“I’m in one of the swan boats on Lake Eola.” Even if you peddled as fast as you could, it’d still take you at least two hours to get back to the office, so you might as well just live it up while you’re there. Tell your boss you’ll be there just as soon as you feel like it.

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“I’m in line at Pizza Bruno.” So it’s probably one of the busiest pizza places in town, with gourmet offerings sure to please even the most sophisticated palate. Let the line manager know that it might be a while, but assure her it’s well worth the wait.

Tell the night shift leader there’s an opening at Gallery at Avalon Island that you just can’t miss, but that you can come in after you’ve had a few glasses of wine and chatted with local artists. It’s okay, everyone wants more creativity in the workplace, right?

“There’s a sidewalk sale on Park Avenue.” You have to work to keep up your polished professional appearance, right? Of course your supervisor will understand if you have to spend the first half of your shift shopping for glamorous work clothes and getting Peterbrooke chocolate.

So, take today and stay home because you’re well! 

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